杀人王曼森

I don't know how accurate this movie is on the Manson Family. So I would just see it as a movie.

When I found Charlie and the family, I got nowhere else to go. Well, not actually, if parents and relatives could be 'somewhere'. No, anywhere I go, I just don't fit in. Charlie told me that I was valuable and I was the most beautiful creature. He couldn't be meaning it, or could he? Maybe I AM valuable just no one else ever noticed. They took over all my belongings as soon as I got there. At first I felt a little insecure without anything MINE. But do I really need those stuff, if everything belongs to everyone? Then the stealing and the killing. Technically, killing people is easy, really. The only thing you need is the belief that killing is not a crime, not a sin. That's easy too, because that's what Charlie says, and he must be right, he has to be right. He's our saviour, we're all brothers and sisters, and we love each other, we'd do anything for each other, for Charlie.

After a while, I felt somehow uncomfortable. Am I not used to living with love? Am I tired of love or what? I think I know what Manson Family means. It means it's a family. Yeah, a family, like other millions billions of families, where all members claim they love each other only because they can't face the fact that they don't. But Charlie can't be wrong, can he?

Then we got nicked. Here's my father asking 'Why?!' with tears in his eyes, as if he could understand, as if he would listen at all. 'WHY' is always so important though no asker really wants the answer. At that moment, I suddenly felt it all worthwhile, even only for confusing and upsetting him.

Of course I went back to my old family at last. A convenient choice. So that's what I did in all those years, running away from a family, joining another, and running back, as a rebel, a traitor and a lost child. I didn't say much to my parents. The good thing about parents is that you don't have to explain everything to them, you'd better not.

Sometimes, when people get annoying, I sort of miss my life with Charlie, wish I was still in his family. Then I laugh at myself thinking one family is better than another. But it's such a fun to imagine how these people would feel if I stab their families to death, leaving them wondering why. Such fantasy is pathetic I know, but 'pathetic' is THE truth about real life, isn't it?

useful links:
http://www.charliemanson.com/

http://www.crimelibrary.com/serial_killers/notorious/manson/murder_1.html


Helter Skelter
by The Beatles

When I get to the bottom
I go back to the top of the slide
Where I stop and turn
and I go for a ride
Till I get to the bottom and I see you again
Yeah, yeah, yeah
Do you don't you want me to love you
I'm coming down fast but I'm miles above you
Tell me tell me come on tell me the answer
and you may be a lover but you ain't no dancer

Go helter skelter
helter skelter
helter skelter
Yeah, hu, hu
I will you won't you want me to make you
I'm coming down fast but don't let me break you
Tell me tell me tell me the answer
You may be a lover but you ain't no dancer

Look out
Helter skelter
helter skelter
helter skelter
Yeah, hu, hu
Look out cause here she comes

When I get to the bottom
I go back to the top of the slide
Where I stop and turn
and I go for a ride
Till I get to the bottom and I see you again
Yeah, yeah, yeah

Well will you won't you want me to make you
I'm coming down fast but don't let me break you
Tell me tell me tell me the answer
You may be a lover but you ain't no dancer

Look out
Helter skelter
helter skelter
helter skelter
Yeah, hu,

Helter Skelter
She's coming down fast
Yes she is
Yes she is
coming down fast